My Name is Tobi, And I Like Girls
by Blixxx
Summary: Hey Everyone here's the thing. This is for Ladies and Gentleman! COMPLETELY STRAIGHT! Deidara confesses to Tobi, but he likes girls. What will Diedara do to make sure he gets what he wants? Get a Sex-Change? TobiXFemaleDeidara -ON HOLD
1. What Tell? Oo

-1**Hello ladies and hopefully gentleman! Blix here with my friend Ryuk. We put this story together for you all. Um it's a TobixDiedara fic, but before you guys go running WAIT! This is NOT a gay fic. We're both guys who like Deidara so he's gonna be a girl eventually. Ladies you should like it too.**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Naruto because if we did Tsunade, and Ino would be ours. Muwahahah!**

"_This is boring", _Thought Deidara as he slowly blew some air on his freshly painted nails. After capturing the Sanbi the two had not yet received their next orders from the

leader, and so here he was sitting in a village in the middle of nowhere with a child… _Well he's sweet if nothing, else, and I do… Never mind_ Deidara quickly stopped his

thinking process before he was in dangerous Territory. It was common knowledge that he had some sort of feelings for Tobi, but after the loss of Sasori Deidara had always had

a bad taste in his mouth, about moving forward. _Where was Tobi anyway. _(Deidara looked around suspiciously)_ He's been quiet for a long time now…Not even I take _

_showers this long. _"SEMPAI!", Tobi's voice rang throughout the small room as Deidara felt soaking wet arms wrap around his neck putting a lot of pressure on his body.

"GET THE HE OFF OF ME!", Deidara screamed throwing the shaken Tobi off him. "GWAA!",Tobi let out a small shriek as he tripped banging his head against the back

wall, and causing his mask to fall around his neck. "Ow Sempai your mean", Tobi rubbed the back of his head. Deidara turned around and let his mouth hang open shocked.

Tobi was laying against the wall soaking wet in a towel his mask around his neck, and aside from a bit of bandages covering his left eye he was gorgeous. His black hair was still

wet and clung to his neck, that gave off the perfectly sculpted shape. The eye that was visible was of course the sharing an and looked like a small dot of ink swirling around in a

pool of blood. Deidara started to clench his fist a little. _I can't its not write…not to Sasori-Dono..It would betray him, but..but.._ That was it. Deidara walked around the

couch and placing his hand across Tobi's now red face, he stuck out his tongue running it across Tobi's neck. "Err. Sempai what..what are you doing", Tobi was shocked t say

the slightest, but there was no way he'd ask Deidara to stop. _I must be dreaming. Is she touching me? The most amazing woman in the world is on top of me right _

_now. _Tobi's thoughts were crushed as Deidara's lips slammed against his harshly causing him to wince for a second before returning the kiss. "I can't take it any more." Deidara

breathed out between harsh kisses. "I know I'm betraying Sasori..But I think I'm in love with you, and I need to find out...Tell me you love me?" Deidara asked hopefully

breaking a second to get some air…Tobi smiled the best he could. Of course he loved her with all his heart. This was a dream what was the catch. "Sempai of course I love..err

what's that?" Tobi asked blinking slightly with his visible eye. Deidara looked frustrated at the lack of an answer, but asked anyway. "What's what?". Tobi motioned downward

with his finger at which Deidara turned a bit red. "What do you think Dumba$$ when a guy's put in this situation usually, u know. O.O Tobi stared for a second

speechless.."You're a guy?" Tobi half chocked out feeling physically sick. "OFCOURSE I'M A GUY WHAT ELSE WOULD I BE TEME?!", Deidara got off Tobi and

looked down at the half naked man a look of anger and confusion on his face. "I'm..er I'm sorry Deidara-Sempai but I cant do that.." Tobi stood up flustered pulling up his

towel and placing his mask over his face. "Wait what so you mean? where the He are you going", Deidara yelled as Tobi began to leave the room still clad only in a towel.

"Gomen Sempai its just. I'm not like that. I like woman and I thought…I'm gonna get some ice cream I'll bring you some back." Tobi held up his finger trying to create his usual

façade as he ran out of the room half naked. Deidara stood there his face completely from embarrassment, and hurt and anger and.."Well SCREW YOU!" Deidara yelled out

of the building hoping Tobi would here. Deidara sat down on the couch again tears threatening to brake loose._ This is just my fing luck. Leave it to me to fall in love with _

_the only straight guy in the Akatsuki. _

READ AND REVIEW PLEASE WE GOTTA KNOW IF YOU WANT MORE!


	2. Solution Much

-1**Hey this is Ryuk, taking over the disclaimer for this-HEY APPLE runs off, chasing the flying apple**

**Blix: Hehehe. Too easy. Well, I hope you enjoyed the last chapter; On with the show!**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Naruto…or Death Note for that matter . . **

Three days had passed since Tobi's rejection of Deidara. _He still hasn't brought the little situation we had up…I wonder what he thinks of--? AH, Dit! There I go again! _

Tobi had, for the most part, still been his regular happy-go-lucky self. He still chased the occasional butterfly, marveled at the scenery, and annoyed his sempai with every

passing moment about a random observation. However, there was a distinct lack of contact that had usually been a regular occurrence for them over the time they had known

each other. In fact two days ago, the pair had been walking through a local village and as they were leaving, a merchant appeared in their path…

**Flashback**

"Hello there, my fine man. What may I get for?" said the merchant with his large cart pulled behind him. "What?' exclaimed Deidara, still aggravated from the night before. "We

are NOT BUYING A GODDA-!" Deidara was cut off as an ecstatic Tobi appeared at his side. "SEMPAI, PLEEASE!" Tobi held up a white furry plush of a small rabbit-

looking creature with a jewel imprinted on its forehead. "I WANTS IT SOOO BAD!" Tobi got down on his knees and begged with a river of tears escaping the small hole on

his mask. Deidara could only stare. _Omigod, he's too cute._ "FINE, see if I care." said Deidara as he handed the merchant some cash. Tobi jumped in glee. "SEMPAI, I

LOVE-" A cold chill swept through the air as Tobi's arms froze seconds away from a warm embrace with Deidara. " MY NEW SNUGGUMS!" Tobi suddenly hugged his

plush to his chest, and bowed deeply to his sempai before running off with Mr. Snuggums…

**End Flashback**

_Damn mr..Snuggams..freakin ass.that's my hug he's enjoying right now._ Deidara glared evilly at the plush and reached into his pocket for some payback a la art. "What

are you doing, sempai?" Tobi's face magically appearing in Deidara's view. "F, TOBI!! WHAT THE H?" Deidara exclaimed throwing the clay haphazardly and blowing up the

nearby scenery. Tobi unshielded his eyes, lowering Mr.Snuggums from his head and pointed to Deidara. "Well, you looked kinda angry like you do now and your eye was

twitching like it is now and-" "TOBI!" Tobi sat down for and stared blankly at Deidara as he covered his face with his hand. "Tobi, please", said Deidara, uncovering his face

and looking at Tobi with a lost look on his face. "What don't you like about me? WHY am I not good enough for you?" exclaimed Deidara, letting his hands fall to either side of

his body. Tobi lowered his masked face, his plush hanging to his side. "Sempai, I just can't. Not like this" Tobi looked up, staring straight at Deidara. "Not with you." Deidara

clenched his fist, and gathering a large amount of clay from his pocket, he summoned up a large bird at his side. "Tobi, stay." said Deidara jumping aboard the bird. "B-but s-

sempai-" "I SAID STAY!" shouted Deidara, his eyes wild with anger as he took flight into the air and soon disappeared into the clouds. Tobi sat there removing his mask, and

stared at the plushie his sempai had gotten him.

Deidara dug his fists into the clay bird as hard as he could. _This is a joke. I..I can't ever. There isn't anything I can do. WHAT THE HELL DO I HAVE LEFT._ The words

broke the surface as a few small tears managed to escape his eyes. I can't do anything. I love him, but there is no way for me to be…It hurts…Deidara helplessly sat there

looking strait up. "Sasori-Dono. Do you? What can I do?, Pfft like you would speak to me if you were living…Theres a better chance of Orochimaru re-joining the Akatsuki…

Deidara's eyes shot open., as a small smile appeared on his lips. Orochimaru un?

**2 Weeks Later**

"Oh Sempai I'm so hungry", Tobi mumbled holding his Mr. Snuggles to his chest. He hadn't left as he was commanded. And since he hadn't left he hadn't eaten. His orange

mask hung around his neck as his face had turned a pale unhealthy color. _I won't move…_(Tobi's vision faded a bit to black before returning)_ Sempai told me not to move, _

_and while I can't be with him as…I'll always stay y his side as a fiend._ Tobi held his sides as he smiled deeply wishing that fate had just turned in his favor for once. "ARE

YOU REALLY STILL HERE YOU DUMBA$$!"

Tobi looked upwards smiling at the familiar voice. "Hai Sempai..I'm still.." Tobi was cut off as he went unconscious falling over. Deidara looked surprised for a second but

picked him up and threw the man's lifeless body over her own. "What the he I go through all this and you can't even stay awake long enough to see it. Teme", Deidara finished

and started walking towards the nearest village. Her hips swaying a bit more than usual, and a passed out Tobi on her shoulder.

READ AND REVIEW SO WE KNOW IF YOU WANT US TO KEEP AT IT!


	3. Apples, and the The start of Payback

-1Hi This is Ryuk and Blix. We gotta a few reviews, but we really would like more. So everyone please review. The sooner that happens the sooner chapters go up. Right Ryuk? (Blix takes a bite of an apple)

Ryuk: Ya whatever. (scribbling something in a notebook)

Blix: What are you Aggg my heart (drops down dead. _not really people)_

Ryuk: Take my apple will you. Everyone thoughts are in italics

Disclaimer: We don't own Naruto. Or any of the Death Note stuff we made fun of a few seconds ago.

**Chapter 3 **

Not interested in going back to the hideout and explaining her wondrous life-changing decision to the Leader let alone to that bastard Uchiha or any of the other Akatsuki

members yet, Deidara chose to stay in the nearest village. After buying a couple nights in a hotel, Deidara, with Tobi's unconscious corpse still in toe, walked up the stairs

puzzled over how she had gotten the room so easily. "I mean, the manager may have been a married woman but saying that relationships are always successful if both partners

are equally assertive?" _I knew women were out of their minds, but this is plain ridiculous._ Deidara shook her head and pushed aside some loose strands of hair before

opening the door to the hotel room. Deidara's eyes widened momentarily as she noticed the single queen-sized bed in the room as well as the balcony on the other side. _Wow. _

_She even gave us the suite._ She gracefully sauntered over to the bed and lay the helpless Tobi down on the bed. She smiled a bit as he reacted to the warm bed by snuggling

up to Mr. Snuggles and letting out a light sigh. _Even after two weeks of starvation and exhaustion, he never ceases to lose that adorable personality. _Deidara took off her

traveling cloak and untied her hair, letting it pool down onto her shoulders in blonde shining waves of light as she began to relax having reached the hotel without serious

intrusion. She leaned over Tobi to pull some leaves and twigs out of his hair when Tobi finally began to re-enter the world of the living. Tobi awoke to a sight that most men only

dream of. "BOOBIES!!" Tobi squeaked as he took advantage of the situation and reached out to caress the awaiting mounds. _Mmmm, soft like Okaasan's breakfast _

_pancakes on a sunny day. I must be dreaming._ Tobi happily thought to himself, grinning like a kid in a candy store. "So, what do you think, Tobi my good boy?" Tobi

stopped in his playful caressing as he looked above towards a familiar voice and saw his sempai grinning greedily with a slight blush on his face. "Do you like them?" Deidara

slurred out with in his patented sexy tone before placing his hand on the side of Tobi's mask and pouting. "Un?" Overwhelmed by the sudden entrance of his sempai, the

sequential sexy seduction, the already growing passion from a certain caressing session and his ever-present malnutrition, Tobi slid promptly and silently, like a well-trained S-

rank ninja, out of consciousness. "Oh, d#mnit," yelled Deidara with a slight pout. "It was just getting exciting, too!" _I guess Orochi-teme really knows how to fine tune a new _

_body, Tobi did seem to enjoy them. _(pouting)_ Though these things are a bit to big for my taste. _

**Somewhere with Orochimaru**

Orochimaru let out a loud sneeze. "Oh come on there only a B-cup!" Orochimaru wiped his nose as Kabuto handed him a tissue.

**Back with Deidara and Tobi**

Deidara passed a longing glance at Tobi's prone form before standing up of the bed. _Though he really should eat something. I mean he was waiting for two weeks…_After

thoroughly making sure Tobi wasn't just faking as he was prone to do from time to time, Deidara left the room to find something that might nurture the poor guy back to health.

_And maybe this time I should try a some what different approach. _After gently placing a blanket on Tobi's sleeping form Deidara left there room looking for some sort of

nutrients. Deidara smirked as he walked down the halls of the hotel.

_**With Tobi**_

Tobi snapped back into consciousness as he heard a door shut, but failed to move. After all he hadn't eaten for a while, and he didn't really have the energy. "Where am I?"

Tobi sat up slowly trying to avoid exerting to much pressure on his body. Tobi took a short surveillance of the room around him before noticing his face was cold. _I guess _

_sempai took my mask off. _(Tobi's thoughts were confirmed as he saw his orange swirl mask sitting on the dresser next to him. Tobi (now sitting up took a moment to think)_ Ok _

_lets think…Where am I? Um, I was waiting for sempai, and then..er his face, carried somewhere…Boobies Deidara hot female? O.o now that can't be it…Agg what _

_happened? _Tobi sighed as he chalked it up to a strange dream and held his head as he again started feeling lightheaded. "Must find foooooood..Lets go Mr. Snuggums."

Grabbing the small stuffed animal Tobi began crawling around the odd room hopping to find something.

"I wonder if I bought too much?" Ehh it doesn't really matter I hope he's awake he's turning out to be a real pain in the a$$." Deidara finished speaking as she heard a long

groan coming from inside the room. Panicking for a moment she quickly fumbled for the keys and opened the door to a moaning Tobi on the floor reaching up towards her.

"Sempai I'm sooo hungry". "Dam#it Tobi!" Deidara quickly slammed the door dragging a bag in the room. "Your starting to be more trouble than your worth." Deidara finished

kneeling down and roughly placing Tobi's head on her lap. "Oh Sempai not so ruff.." Tobi wined. _Oh..you just wait how ruff I'm gonna…un..not now focus focus._ Tobi still

had his eye closed and with his malnutrition he couldn't focus on anything let alone enough to realize the new Deidara. Smiling waiting patiently for the realization. "So you really

didn't leave that spot?" Deidara asked slicing an apple she had grabbed from the bag. "I didn't I promise sem--" Tobi was silenced as Deidara promptly shoved an apple slice

into his mouth. "Eat already I don't have time to brake in a new partner un." Deidara continued quietly feeding Tobi the only real sound coming from the munching of the happy

nin. _He should be aware pretty soon. Remember Deidara stick to the plan._ After finishing what he guessed was about three apples Tobi could feel himself regaining strength

as he thought to himself. _He smells different… Like in my dream. If only. I feel so relaxed…I can pretend. Its okay if I imagine. I'll keep my eye closed a little longer _

_than maybe in my mind at least. _(Tobi closed his eye tight drawing Deidara's attention) "What's with the wincing Baka?" Deidara asked tilting her head to the side causing her

hair to tickle Tobi's face. He smiled. "I had a dream about you Sempai." said Tobi smiling even bigger. "Oh you did. Hmmf Little Pervert." Deidara laughed playfully slapping

Tobi's head. Tobi laughed and continued. "I did. You were a girl and had these beautiful..er..nvm." Tobi abruptly stopped realizing it probably wasn't the best thing to say.

"Beautiful what?" Deidara scowled slightly at Tobi's incomplete sentence. "Nothing sempai." Tobi replied blushing hard now. "Dumba$$." Deidara got up letting Tobi's head

slam hard against the floor. "Ahh Sempai that hurt!" Tobi slowly sat up rubbing the back of his head and finally opening his eye. _My little dream's over back to the real…_

Tobi's thought pattern changed as he finally got a good look at Deidara. _Slight bust, hips curved slightly. Beautiful butt..err he always had a nice a$$ err. No Bad Tobi. _

"SEMPAI IS THAT YOU! WHAT HAPPENED!" Tobi yelled his thoughts _catching_ up with him. Deidara smiled. _Took long enough. Got him. Check mate. _"What you

mean un?" Deidara bent over to look at Tobi smiling as cute as she could. Tobi Blushed even harder. "Err sempai What? How? Err is that a henge or…? Tobi stared stopping

his questions. "Tobi don't stare its Pi$$ing me off." Deidara smirked. As if he was getting off the hook. No way She would make sure Tobi was begging for her before he got so

much as a pat on the back. "B..But Sempai." Tobi was now wobbling back in forth obviously confused as Hell. Deidara let out a fake sigh. "I changed if you know what I

mean, no its not a henge, yes its permanent." Deidara let out an amused smile. Tobi finally got his mind in check and stood up. "Err, Why Sempai?" Tobi asked taking a few

stepsforward. _Sorry Tobi un_ "I dunno it just seemed the right thing to do. I mean Hell I don't like girls and this seemed an effective way to help my situation out." Deidara

statedmater o factly. Getting no reply Deidara and Tobi sat there a second staring. "OH SEMPAI YOUR SO CUTE!" Tobi apparently had reclaimed his childlike self and

launched himself at Deidara who abruptly kicked him in the face sending him against the wall. "I'm taking a shower Tobi stay off the bed its mine, you sleep on the balcony."

Deidara coldly stated. She would have liked to say. "Please Tobi join me well see if we can't break in this body tonight", but after being rejected like that._ Sorry Tobi, but I _

_don't deal __with rejection well. _With that Deidara walked into the bathroom slamming the door leaving a shocked Tobi laying against the wall to think. _I really am confused _

_err. He's a __she now so is she I suppose she's fair game..but..She doesn't seem to want anything to do with me. I can't say I'd blame her I treated her like crap after _

_he err she __confessed. But then why would sempai go through all this. Does she really just wanna get other guys.(_Tobi lowered his head)_ I always loved her. Now I _

_have a __chance to. __Fate seems to have smiled in my favor for once. _(Tobi seemed to regain his senses) _He loved me once I just gotta get her to love me again. _"I

WON'T GIVE UP!" Tobi yelled standing. "TOBI-TEME YOU BETTER GET YOU'RE A$$ ON THE BALCONY RIGHT NOW!" Deidara screamed from the bathroom.

"Yes sempai…" Tobi sighed grabbing his mask walked outside onto the balcony closing the door behind him like a child who had been punished. Deidara smiled from inside the

shower leaning her new body against the wall as the water glided over her.

Okay that was the chapter I hope you enjoyed it. Please review. That's what lets us know you enjoyed it. Read and Review!


	4. Day of Importance Part 1

-1

**Sup everyone Ryuk and Blix here with more awesome content. Were really liking where the story is going and we hope you all enjoy it too. Um well here we go.**

**Ryuk: Wait what about that K.Furi thing. (lol everyone go read her review)**

**Blix: O ya! I almost forgot. K.Furi tell this Carly friend of yours. HAHAHAHAH DEIDARA'S FAIR GAME FOR US.**

**Ryuk: Yup. Sucks to be you Carly. Anyway on with the show!**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Naruto.**

Emerging from the shower wrapped in a towel, Deidara smiled to herself as she noticed the curtains to the balcony closed. _At least he isn't a total pervert; who knows? I _

_may let him watch..._ A mischievous grin slowly made its way unto Deidara's beautiful face.

**On the balcony**

_A strong hot wind blew across the deserted wasteland, throwing a sand cloud all about the area. A large tumbleweed ran between two star-crossed fighters. They _

_glared at each other, one adorned in an orange one-eyed mask while the other wore dark shades and a sparkling red ruby on his forehead. While staring each other _

_down, each one waited for the other to reach for a kunai. Both opponents were the best of the best in terms of skill and notoriousness, but only one could walk away _

_with the big prize here: the hand of the beautiful blonde maiden currently tied to the flagpole. All of a sudden, a rattlesnake shot out of a nearby barrel and leaped at _

_the helpless maiden. Without a second thought, Orange Mask leapt into action and, pulling out a kunai, sliced the snake horizontally across its body as he ran in _

_between the snake and its target. Blood and guts sprang across the battlefield, but all fell silent as Black-Shaded Ruby keeled over with a snake fang lodged in his _

_throat. Careful not to harm the lady, Orange Mask removed her bindings and carried her bridal style over to his faithful blue gilled steed Kisamehada. _"I trust you

are not injured, Miss-?" _Orange Mask was suddenly cut off as his mask was discarded to the side and the blonde-haired blue-eyed beauty attacked her savior, pulling _

_him into a rather passionate liplock. A fire erupted inside him as he locked his arms around her, pulling her surprisingly soft body closer to his. Pulling apart after a _

_couple of minutes to catch their breath, Orange Mask stared into the girl's slightly glazed over expression and uttered, "I think I love yo-!" before the girl reached _

_for him again and without warning bit his ear clean off!_

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!" screamed Tobi as he shot up from his resting place, nearly throwing Mr. Snuggums over the railing as he palmed his

enflamed ear. "AHO AHO AHO", went a crow as it returned to its flock, realizing its food was still living. "Baka bird, it was just getting good too!" said Tobi, silently weeping

to himself over the loss of such a delectable dream. He was about to go back to sleep in hopes of continuing his passion when a gust of hot air passed by him. _Sempai must be _

_done with her shower now. I better be quiet or she'll get mad again._ The door closed with a barely audible sound as Tobi heard the soft patter of footsteps across the room

inside. He heard the footsteps approach the balcony, and quickly pretended to be sleeping. He began to sweat when the door opened slightly, but he calmed down a bit after his

sempai's footsteps retreated leaving him on the balcony.

**Inside the room**

Deidara grinned after retrieving her clay bird and retreating back into the room. _At least I know he's awake now; on with the show…_

**Tobi's POV**

"It's a good thing that idiot's asleep (Tobi winced) or else I'd never be able to let some cool air in here." Tobi tried not to listen as his sempai sighed and a towel fell to the

ground. "But, at least I can get dressed in peace and quiet now." Tobi nearly lost his cool but managed to keep his blood loss to a small constant trail streaming from his nose.

_OMG! I can't watch sempai dress! But, I can't miss this! I…I.I.._ Tobi gave into his desire and slowly turned in his sleep to get an acceptable but hidden view. The curtains

were still closed and the door opening was too far away for the S-rank ninja to see anything without being caught. _Grr, what I wouldn't give to have Sasori's puppets or the _

_Byakugan right now! Where are my super special awesome ninja seeing abilities? The world is so unfair._ Tobi silently wept to himself when miraculously, the moon was

suddenly covered by really slow moving clouds and Tobi could now make out his sempai's silhouette through the curtains. _Yay! There really is a god in this world._

**Somewhere with Jiraiya**

Jiraiya sneezed without warning, giving away his position. He proceeded to run for his life as the moon-touched beauties chased him with blazing killing intent.

**With Tobi**

Tobi watched, entranced, as Deidara picked up a container of some kind and began to smooth it over her skin. "Ooooh, it feels so good, uunnnnn!" Deidara exclaimed sweetly,

rubbing her arm. Swinging her head down so that her hair fell like a waterfall down a mountain side, she began to rub lotion on her legs. "So soft and smooth, UN." Tobi

watered at the mouth and shuddered at each and every 'un' his sempai uttered. With his mind still in disbelief and awe at the silhouette sight before him, Tobi was completely

helpless and barely able to control himself.

**With Deidara**

She could only smirk to herself as she continued to slowly play with Tobi's mind. _Hehe, the little pervert is totally enjoying it. His lustful emotions are rolling off in waves; _

_just glad he still remembers to conceal himself physically. _She nearly laughed out loud when Tobi visibly twitched in response to her moans while she rubbed her shoulders

and neck. _Un. Time to finish this though. Can't afford to roll in a new partner. Not that I'd want anyone else anyway._

**With Tobi**

Tobi took a deep long breath and closed his eye quickly as he attempted to regain control of his situation…well, make that situations. _O…K. I KNOW this can't be a dream, _

_and I'm REALLY liking what's going on, but I should probably take the time now to properly respect sempai and whatever dignity I have left and promptly make my _

_way into sleepy-sleepy –_ "Alright, time to get flexible and get my back.", exclaimed Deidara from inside. Tobi's head shot up faster than Maito Gai's could if he had all eight

Celestial Gates open. Tobi's jaw hit the ground as he witnessed his sempai sitting in the seiza position holding the container high above her head as its contents smoothly slid

down Deidara's backside. The event of Deidara's sequential moan of "Unnnnnnn!" coincided with the sound of Tobi's mask cracking against the ground as he succumbed to

the coming darkness.

**With Deidara**

_Hook, line, and sinker._ Throwing on her sleeping clothes, Deidara went out to the balcony to check up on her audience. She smiled, noticing the shocked but pleased

expression on his face. _Least he enjoyed himself. I know I did._ As she moved to put her partner in a better sleeping position, a piece of paper fell out of his cloak. Picking it up

and examining it, Deidara noted the well-made drawing (for a second grader) of Tobi kneeling before a Deidara in the princess gown on a throne as well as the message in a

heart at the top: 'Please forgive me, my loving sempai. I wish to always be at your side!' A tear escaped Deidara's eye and rolled down her cheek as she held the drawing close

to her heart and smiled earnestly. _Omigod, that idiot. _She wiped the tear from her face and squatted down to touch Tobi's hair. _But, it's really cute and nice; of course, I _

_want you to be at my side._ Reaching down to Tobi's level, Deidara gave him a light kiss on the cheek before reentering the room and putting the picture down on the table.

She climbed into bed, and fell fast asleep, dreaming of an orange-masked figure standing with the sun rising on the horizon and his cloak billowing in the wind.

**The Next Day**

Tobi awoke to his unfamiliar surroundings with an extremely stiff back. After a few aggravating seconds he finally sat up and rubbed his eye yawning. _Man this stinks. I wish _

_sempai would let me sleep inside. (sigh)_ Tobi stood up and knocked on the door. "Sempai? Are you awake? Can I come inside?" Tobi sat there a few seconds waiting for a

response. Inside the Hotel Deidara smirked as she finished getting dressed. She looked in the mirror and gave herself a wink. _Pretty damn good. If I do say so myself. _

(Deidara did a little spin causing the skirt she was wearing to almost float. _Definitely a good choice._ Deidara had purchased some femine clothing the night before along with

Tobi's food. _Now, lets get the heart pumping. After all today was the day everything is gonna come together un. _Deidara unbuttoned her shirt and slid it off her shoulders

revealing her new assets, and smiled thinking a bit more._ Heck if things go as planned than maybe we can enjoy this body like I wanted to last night. _Deidara felt a small

blush come to her face at this thought as she finally responded to Tobi. "Tobi, hurry up and get ready, I have stuff to do today. Tobi's ears perked up at his Sempai calling his

name and rushed in the room. "MORNING SEMP…." Tobi stopped as Deidara quickly threw on her shirt and began rebuttoning her it. "WHAT THE HELL PERVERT

DON'T LOOK!", Deidara screamed turning and mentally laughing her a$$ off at her blushing shaken Tobi. "Go..Gomen sempai but you called me in and I thought-" Deidara

cut Tobi off again. "Whatever I don't wanna hear it. Hurry up and grab what you need I wanna get breakfast before entering town, un.", "Hai Sempai." Tobi walked to the

bathroom quickly washing his face before exiting again. Deidara slid on her shoes, and gave herself one more look. "Do I look okay Baka?" Deidara asked turning around for

Tobi. _Like an angel. _"Like an angel, sempai.", Tobi drooled looking her over from her skirt and knee high socks to her usual hair style. _Hahah he's so sweet._ _I just wanna _

_tackle him… no he hasn't earned that yet. _"What the hell do you know lets go." Deidara blankly stated dragging Tobi out of the room, as he replaced his mask crying.

Once outside Deidara held her hands behind her back and walked smiling. _Wow this is great I can act as girly as I want, and it only makes me cuter This rules. Hmmf _

_Tobi doesn't look too good, but he disserves it. Whatever, I need some food._ Tobi walked slouching and miserable next to his beautiful, and cute sempai. _Okay Tobi we _

_can do this, I just need to show Sempai how important she is to me. I'll show her Tobi is a good boy._ "Tobi, I'm hungry. Find me a place to eat." Deidara smirked looking

at her nails. "Hai, I'll find you a good place to eat breakfast. Tobi looked around for a second before disappearing with a breeze of wind, planning on finding his sempai a

special place to eat. Deidara frowned. "He better not take too long. Gahh knowing that fool he'll probably get distracted by a falling leaf. Deidara took a seat on a nearby bench

crossing her legs and laying her face in her hand bored.

About fifteen minutes passed and Deidara was starting to get annoyed. _Jeez Tobi the town isn't that big how hard is it to find a restaurant. _Deidara adjusted her legs

causing her skirt to slide up a bit more. As if on cue Tobi reappeared on in a nearby tree holding his stupid stuffed rabbit. "Huff. Huff. Sorry Sempai. I found a place, but then I

realized I left Mr. Snuggums at the hotel so I went back to get him. Deidara gave an angry look. _She doesn't look pleased._ Tobi sweat dropped. Deidara wasn't particularly

pleased about having to wait so he could retrieve a toy, but she simply stood up brushing off her skirt. After all for her plan to work today would have to play out exactly as she

wanted. "Where's the place Tobi?", asked Deidara placing her hands on her hips. _Something's not right here._ Tobi thought starting to feel a bit frightened. "Um its over that

way Deidara-Sempai." Tobi pointed down the street as Deidara started walking. Tobi sighed. I have a bad feeling about this. _Maybe I should have left Mr.Snugums…Naw _

_that cant be it._ Tobi finished his thoughts and ran after his sempai. "SEMPAI WAIT FOR ME! TOBI IS HUNDRY TO!"

**Ok everyone so the next chapter is the couples first date, they'll have a nice breakfast and… He he he. Well you can all just wait and see. Read and Review.**


	5. Day of Importance Part 2

-1**(Blixxx is resting soundly atop Ryuk as they fly soundly across the sky.)**

**Ryuk (smiling with sweatdrop and holding up peace sign): Hey readers! Sorry it's been so long, but I've got quite the interesting story behind that.**

**Ryuk kicks back in a rocking chair and opens up a large brown book to reveal glowing pages. Blixxx' body sits in front attentively**

**Ryuk: Once upon a time, there lived a giant snake that liked eating winged creatures. That snake never died, and still lives today, lurking in the shadows waiting for unsuspecting winged prey. **

**Ryuk abruptly slams the book closed, waking Blixxx from unconsciousness.**

**Blixxx (rubbing his eyes): wuh happened? Arsh we there yet?**

**Ryuk: That snake is definitely dead now. Heheheee, the end.**

**Blixxx (still attempting to fully wake up): Hey, Ryuk. How long ago did we land?**

**Ryuk: Land? Ryuk looks down just in time to his rocking chair burst into naught but splinters on the rapidly approaching land below Hmm, we were flying, **

**weren't we?**

**Blixxx screams to his doom holding onto Ryuk's wings with all his might as they free-fall to the ground below**

**Random Scream: Hey, I think the splinters spell out a message! "I do not own any Naruto or Death Note references in this fanfiction."**

**----------------------------------------------------------------**

Sempai are you mad at me?" Asked Tobi following behind Deidara as closely as he possibly could. "No Tobi I'm not mad at you just tell me where the restaurant is un.",

Deidara snapped back as the two continued walking down the street._ She's obviously mad…_Tobi looked down at the floor upset before readjusting his mask. His head

bobbed up and down as his focus turned to Deidara's curvy body. Her body seemed to float as she walked. _So perfect must…drool_ Tobi was so caught up in his little viewing

party that he didn't notice as they passed the restaurant he had picked out.

**15 Minutes Later**

"Hey Dumba$$ how much longer before we get there?" Deidara asked turning around. She did

her best to hide her laugh as Tobi had drool and a bit of blood coming out the bottom of his mask. _Little_

_pervert un. NO no Stay strong Deidara after today you can have him. _Deidara slapped the side of Tobi's

head snapping him out of his trance. "Huh? What is it Sempai?" Tobi asked turning a deep red under his

mask. "I asked where the hell this place was I'm hungry and we've been walking for thirty minutes!" Deidara let her voice come out as angry as possible, and Tobi cringed a bit.

"Gomen Sempai it's um..Um..?" Tobi looked around and to his horror realized they had passed the

restaurant a while ago. "Um Sempai we actually that is…It's that way. Tobi scratched the back of

his head apologetically as he pointed in the direction they had just come from. Deidara's eye

twitched a bit. "WHAT THE HE TOBI PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT YOUR DOING! WHAT THE

HELLWERE YOU DOING! NOT PAYING ATTENTION! YOU REALLY ARE BECOMING.."Deidara

Continued yelling as she dragged the crying Tobi by his collar.

After a long walk back and a lot of yelling they arrived at the restaurant. Tobi got up and dusted him self off crying a bit. "Sempai please don't be mad. I promise Tobi will be a

good boy." Tobi cried tears escaping from his eye hole. _Hahaha he's really cute. Everything's going better than I excepted if it keeps going like this I'm gonna be cough _

_cough By tonight. I Wonder if this body can get pregnant._ Deidara's thoughts were interrupted as the hostess called out. "How many?" Deidara purposely gave the slouched

over crying Tobi a dirty look. "Two please." Deidara replied after a second. "Thank you right this way. Your server's name is Keji he should be with you in a second." The

hostess bowed and left leaving the two sitting in a small booth. It wasn't a huge booth, but it easily sat the two so they were sitting across from each other. Deidara grabbed a

menu and started looking it over all the while giving Tobi an angry look. Tobi straitened out the robe he was so proud to wear and removed his mask. Deidara felt bad for a

second, but remembering how he had rejected her, Deidara stuck to his plan. Tobi's face was red and flushed from the tears he had been crying earlier and the eye he had not

wrapped up seemed red and puffy. _Sempai must be really mad at me…Well..Tobi will just have to do his best to make her happy again_ . Tobi wiped his eye and tried to

smile setting down Mr. Snuggums down in the seat next to him and patting its head. Deidara let a growl escape her mouth as she again saw the stuffed toy getting affection. She

was just about to comment when the waiter arrived. "Hello my names Keji how can I be of service today?" Keji smiled mostly at Deidara causing Tobi to frown. Keji had light

yellow hair with pink highlights. He had blue eyes, and was extremely muscular. This was evident by the tank top he was wearing. _Isn't that a bit revealing for a waiter. _Tobi

thought trying his best to keep his calm demeanor. "Ya, ok gimmie some pancakes and a cup of coffee." Deidara replied a bit annoyed by this person. _I don't know why but _

_this Keji really rubs me the wrong way. Maybe I'll blow him up? _Deidara smirked to herself as Keji turned to Tobi. "Hahah and what about you little guy?" Keji laughed at

Tobi seeing the stuffed toy, and his tear stained cheeks. _Control yourself Tobi, If we upset Sempai anymore she'll…she'll…_ Tobi Looked up a bit angry. "I'll have the funny

face pancakes and a cup of hot chocolate." Tobi stated proudly. Deidara put her face in her hands doing her best not to laugh. "We'll aren't we the little trooper? Haha retard."

Keji laughed as he walked away to give the orders. Deidara felt a wave of disgust pass through her as Keji gave her a small wink on his way out. Tobi did his best not to crush

the end of the table he was now holding on to quite tightly. _Damn stupid waiter making fun of Tobi..Tobi's a good boy, Tobi's a good boy._

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Poor Tobi! Will he survive the breakfast without losing his cool? Or will Deidara beat him to the punch on deciding Keji's fate? Find the next time and please keep reviewing!

Next chapter will be up a lot sooner than this one was.


	6. Day of Importance Part 3

-1

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Death Note or any other anime/cartoon/movie references in this fanfiction. If I did, L might be a shinigami right now alive and well, but I'm 

not that fortunate. (sincerely Ryuk)

**In the kitchen**

"Yo, Jouhi! I need 2 orders of flapjacks, a coffee, and a cup of hot chocolate." yelled Keji to the obese man working the kitchen. Jouhi nodded in reply and was just about to

turn his back to begin working when Keji tapped his shoulder. "Go ahead and play…'the tune' once I get the order." Jouhi's stomach rumbled when he laughed merrily in

response to Keji's sly grin. Jouhi picked up a bottle of hot sauce and smiled at Keji. Keji put his hands behind his head and leaned back against the wall. "Oh, yeah. Real hot

stuff out there. Haven't seen an ass like that since the Fire Daimyo's wife before she really let herself go." Keji's eyes glazed over slightly as he reminisced about the feat that

gave him the infamous name Groove That Gorilla. _Yep, gooooood times. _Keji shook his head and looked back up at Jouhi. "Yeah, and you wouldn't believe the guy this

chick's sitting with. Not only is the guy a kid through and through, but he's even got this doll with him. Called it Snuggers, or some weird ss $hit like that." Jouhi opened his eyes

in disbelief at the statement and waved off Keji. Keji leapt off the wall with a cheery expression on his face. "Totally serious, man. I wouldn't give him too much grief about it

though. Guy has half his face wrapped up, so he probably has a screw loose and she pities him with pancakes." Keji sniggered to himself about his great sense of humor as Jouhi

shook his head and turned back to the kitchen stove to cook. "But, I'll leave ya alone to work" said Keji as he began to move away from the counter. He stopped suddenly and

turned back to Jouhi before pointing at Jouhi and winking. "Just remember to strike up my tune when I get back. It's time to show 'em how I roll."

**At the table**

Deidara sat at the table alone, eyes closed and rubbing her temples. _Gosh, how much longer is that idiot going to spend in the bathroom? He's been gone for like 20 _

_minutes now! _Opening her eyes, she, once again, peered down at the strewn kid menus on the table top. Picking one up, Deidara barely looked at it for a second before

slamming it back down on the table. _And if that dunce EVER asks me to play Tic-Tac-Toe again, I'll personally tic-tac him to the wall by his toes and use him for target _

_practice. _She smiled softly to herself before she was suddenly interrupted by the loud rumbling of her stomach. _AND WHERE THE H377 IS THAT F042ING WAITER WITH _

_MY FOOD??!?! Isn't it his job to prevent customers and especially females from waiting for food? _"Didn't even get free bread; WTF!" Feeling stressed once again,

Deidara began to reach into her pouch to teach some people about the consequences of angering an Akatsuki member when without warning the restaurant lights went pitch

black. Instinctively, Deidara uncovered her eagle eye and switched to night vision mode when colored strobe lights began to light up the area if only slightly. _What in the world _

_is wrong with this pl-? _Deidara's train of thought was cut off as music began to play throughout the establishment.

**He was born and raised to rule**

**No one has ever been as cool**

**In a thousand years of ninja-ocracy (A/N: Yep, I went there.)**

**An enigma and a mystery**

**In Kill-Or-Be-Killed history**

**The quintessence of perfection**

**That is he!**

Deidara could only sit and stare at the sight slack-jawed as a robed Keji leapt three tables with the undisturbed food in his hand. Landing gracefully and placing down the food

on the table, he bowed to Deidara's unbelieving face and cracked a smile that shone in a manner that only two beasts in the world could imitate.

**What's his name?**

**In the bathroom…stall**

Holding his face in his hands, Tobi couldn't believe his luck. After a couple of minutes of rest from being assaulted by the blonde barbarian who was their waiter, Tobi had tried

his first attempt at making sure his sempai would not be bored during dinner. _I guess I shouldn't play games at the table. Hmmm. According to the Official Guide to _

_Impressing the Ladies book that Itachi-san gave-_ Tobi winced as a pair of Sharingan eyes glared at him in his mind's eye. _Err, I meant, that he LOANED to me..._ Tobi

sighed in relief as the eyes vanished without a word. _The book said women would be wooed by beautiful speech…_

**Flashback**

"So, Sempai? Have I ever truly thanked and blessed you yet?" Tobi got down on his knees and placed a hand on Deidara's knee before staring intently at her. "Have I shown

you my utmost devotion and love in response to the thing you gave me even if it was at a whim?" Tobi put on his brightest smile and reached up to cup his Sempai's face in his

hand. "The one thing from you that I will cherish for all my life?" He stared into Deidara's eyes, hoping and wishing to see a sign of some affection for him as she seemed to gaze

attentively into his eyes. "Sempai," Tobi said with his hand inches away from his sempai's warm, soft, and creamy skin. "I will always think of you," Tobi could have sworn he

heard a soft gasp but too caught up in the moment he continued. "Always when I'm with Mr.Snuggums."

**Back in the stall**

Tobi rubbed his sore nose into Snuggums' soft furry coat. _Everything went hazy for a while after that. I still don't remember what happened, but it sure wasn't a-_

Forgetting the word, Tobi flipped to the first page to find it. "Here it is! A 'one-way ticket to Funkytown'?" Clearly confused, Tobi flipped to the next page, hoping to find a

definition or maybe even his ticket, but was astonished to find the book contained no other pages. "What's this message though? 'That's all I need. RAWR. Signed Uchiha-

sama'" Placing the book back in his pocket, Tobi sighed to himself and left the stall. _Well, as long as I have Snuggums on my side, nothing will stand in my way of winning _

_Sempai's heart._ With his courage restored, Tobi ventured out of the bathroom just in time to see Keji's Olympic-class leap across the restaurant. Tobi soon after adopted an

expression oddly similar to Deidara's at the moment. (A/N: Must be destiny.)

**KEJI!**

**That's his name!**

**KEJI!**

Without loosing the beat, Keji leapt back from Deidara and began to dance in the middle of the restaurant.

**He's the king of the world!**

**KEJI!**

Doing a somersault into the air, Keji rolled onto the ground without harm and began to do the Worm.

**Is he hip or what?**

**KEJI!**

Keji smirked to himself as he noticed Deidara's still blank expression. _Too easy. Now, to take my prize._ Without a second's hesitation, Keji began to worm his way towards

Deidara's prone form. When he was inches away from Deidara, he stood up and threw his arms back wide in order to ready himself for the capture of his prey like King Kong

ready to strangle his foe in a bear hug.

**Yeah**

Keji's mouth moved in sync with the line of the song when he was suddenly cut off by a large white puffball striking him in the face. "What the #377?!?!?" Suddenly, Keji felt the

ground leave his feet as he was tripped and fell flat on his back before the wind was knocked out of him by a heavy object sitting on his chest. Throwing the white fluff off his

face, Keji shouted, "Whoever you are, you totally threw off my groo-!" before he cut off in fear of the unbelievable killing intent emanating from the figure on top of him. Keji

wet himself at the sight of the glowing swirling red eye staring intensely at him as a deep vengeful voice seemed to echo about the room. "**No one touches my sempai and gets **

**away with it! Your A$$ is MINE, groove-man!"**

Cliffhangers. Can't live with them, world would be boring without them. Please read and review if you want to know the consequences to messing with Tobi's sempai.


	7. Day of Importance Part 4

-1Ok well we took a little bit of time, but Finally its all good. Right Ryuk?

Ryuk: (nods) Ya just so you all know I wrote most of this chapter.

Blix: But I thought you were out of paper?

Ryuk: It's ok I used paper from this. (holds up death note)

Blix: O O

(Deidara, Keji, and Tobi have heart attacks)

Blix: YOU IDIOT!

Ryuk: sorry.

Disclaimer: WE DO NOT OWN NARUTO OR DEATHNOTE OR ANY CHARACTERS USED.

Keji stared in horror, entranced by the glowing red ruby eyes eerily glaring at him in the dimmed light. He was helpless as he watched a hand raise in the darkness. Keji paled as a light shone off the razor sharp tip of a kunai in the hand of his attacker. **"Any last words, chum?"** asked the shadowy figure in front of him poised to strike. Keji could say nothing, still unable to fully comprehend his coming demise and shut his eyes waiting for his fate. _Why me? Why not some other god in human form? Will my reign as king of the apes really end like this?_ Without warning, Keji felt the weight lifted off of him and opened his eyes to find his reaper had swiftly retreated to the opposite side of the room. Keji gave a start when a large paw grabbed his arm and pulled him up, but gave a sigh of relief at the paw's owner. "Jouhi! Thank my fatherly gods!" Keji made to hug his big jolly friend, but was pushed aside as Jouhi glared at Keji's attacker, butcher knife in hand. Taking a deep breath and pushing his hand through his long blonde hair, Keji took a cocky stance and grinned wildly at his attacker. "You may have surprised me once dude, but it's not happening again." Clapping his hands twice, Keji looked on with confidence as the lights came on again in full force, revealing the attacker's true identity to be… "HAH! It's the retarded guy with the doll!" Keji rocked his head back and roared with laughter. Tobi only stood in place, glaring silently at his foe but ready to attack at any moment. "Stand aside, Jouhi! I've got this sucker. Take him out with my good old' one-two!" Throwing his cape to the side, Keji revealed a pair of boxer gloves labeled '一'　and '二 'on the surface of the gloves. Putting them on, Keji stood bare-chested with naught on but athletic shorts and a pair of sandals, and slowly walked over to Tobi with his muscular chest held out and a wild look on his face. He stopped in front of Tobi, standing at an intimidating 6 foot 5 inches with a ripped upper body, bulging muscular arms, and a confident look in his eyes that promised immortal pain for his opponents. "Ready to be taken out, twit?" Pulling an arm back for a charged up punch of fury, Keji stared deep into Tobi's emotionless Sharingan eye and flew his fist forward.

**Deidara's POV**

Slowly waking from unconsciousness, Deidara took in her surroundings. _Ah, my head's killing me, yea. What happened? _Deidara gave a visible jump as she noticed the wreaked place. _What in the name of-! _Deidara suddenly felt a small pulse of chakra as a large blonde gorilla launched an attack at a short man in black and red clothing. _How did I end up at a zoo? _She was fully awake seconds later when said ape went flying past her in the opposite direction through the wall of the restaurant as the man in red and black withdrew his out-stretched leg and shunshin'ed away. _O shit! What the hell? _The orange mask on the fellow's face suddenly jogged her memory as well, and her jaw dropped for the second time today (though she still struggled to remember the first). "…Tobi?!!?"

**On the busy streets of the village**

Stepping slowly from the wreckage as nearby pedestrians fled the scene, Tobi continued to stare right at Keji's slowly rising form in the parking lot. Said person had gone been launched without enough force to demolish a couple of food stands that had been unfortunately placed adjacent to the now agape restaurant wall. _WTF, hit me? Geez, like a bould-_ Keji put a hand to his head to rub a vicious bump on his head but stopped and after touching his hair. His eyes opened wide. _Is this…RAMEN…IN MY HAIR?!?!?_ Looking up, he realized his flight through the air had in fact landed him directly into the side of a ramen pot, launching the contents of the bucket into his wild blonde mane which now seemed browner in comparison. It was definitely not shining though in the sunlight, and that, in of itself, seemed to pose a problem.

"RRRAAAWWWWWRRRR!!!" Leaping into the air, Keji landed back onto the ground, light on his feet. His previous wounds and injuries were still present on his body but any pain caused by them was not apparent by the berserk-like expression on Keji's current face. His eyes danced madly though they primarily focused on the black-and-red figure on the horizon. His grin was split open into a snarl, with his side fangs exposed and dripping with drool. He was slumped over a little as well as if carrying a large weight on his back, but his tensed legs showed that he was ready to attack at any given moment. "You are dead, maggot!" Keji shouted in rage before bounding madly at Tobi, on all four limbs.

However, Keji had barely taken a single step before a black boot hit him squarely in the face, toppling him over on his back and seemingly into another power flight. However, it was canceled as he met a sharp elbow at his back and a swift kick to his posterior that launched him straight up into the air. Keji's eyes only barely registered a bright light that his barely functioning mind assumed to be the sun before his body was awash with scalding pain.

**Fire Release: Grand Fireball Technique**! Keji screamed in primal terror as the burning flames racked at his body but a swift axe kick to the face shut him up before he landed into the ramen pot below. A couple of seconds passed before Keji's head burst from inside the pot to the surface and he fell unceremoniously into the ruins of the ramen shop. Although badly burned by the fireball, Keji's eyes still retained their murderous intent as he again locked onto Tobi's still figure in the distance. **Still up and about? **Tobi's dark voice called out. **Tobi can fix that.** Without warning, Tobi vanished only to reappear in front of Keji, foot pulled back ready for a boot kick to send his opponent halfway across town. Keji clenched his arm around the nearest object, his savior ramen pot, and threw it at Tobi, hoping blindly to catch him off guard. However, as soon as the object left Keji's hand, it was replaced by Tobi's levitating figure with his two hands forming a ninja symbol.

**Earth Release: Earth Dragon Bullet**! The head of a dragon manifested from the ground below, its ruby eyes shining with a ferocity that outdid the gorilla's own. Keji had barely enough to reach out his fist and grab a hold of Tobi's cloak before he was hit point-blank in the chest by a solid force of earth. Said mud ball propelled the man clear across the village, crashing him into foliage surrounding the village and throwing up a large dust cloud. Tobi gave no response to a small crowd of villagers that formed up to watch the massacre-I mean, action as Tobi walked silently towards the outskirts of the village. The crowd quickly parted to allow the warrior passage, but a small child entranced by the calm and calculated combat of the ninja was not quick enough to move and stood in the path of the ninja. Before he could comprehend it, the kid was flat on his back, a short distance from the stupefied crowd. As Tobi vanished into the distance and the crowd slowly dispersed in disbelief, most replied believing that that no-good hoodlum gorilla had finally gone too far in his flirting ambitions and called this wraith upon him. Some couldn't understand how the fight had been unleashed from the restaurant, especially seeing as the gap in fighting prowess between the two was farther than the distance between the Leaf Village and the Snow Village, so a simple ambush would've been suitable. Only the child, who had been fortunate (AN: or unfortunate shudders) enough to sneak a peek into the ninja's eyehole, would forever have the image of the Sharingan implanted in the far reaches of his memory and yet never understand the trail of tears leaking from the eye.

**On the outskirts of the village**

Downed trees, uprooted rocks and debris, and a line of dirt stretched out to meet a medium-sized crater were the scene of destruction caused by Tobi's attack on Keji. Birds and other occupants of the forest had long since fled the outskirts of the village, frightened to no end by the killing intent that had exploded out from the village. All of the forest seemed to be dead of life until a bloody hand reached out from underneath the rubble in the crater. The hand froze a little while before falling forward and grasping a tree that had been upended during the chaos. Clenching tightly and flexing the muscles in the forearm despite the multiple wounds seen over it alone, a head and the upper torso of a beaten man were upended as well. A blood red stain mixed with the once-proud blonde mane of the man to create a horrifying red-orange color that matched that of a sunset and covered his entire scalp. The hair had been brutally thrashed, leaving a complete mess compared to the shining brilliance it once was. All in all, it was a complete miracle Keji was still even…

**Alive?** Keji's eyes opened wide before he was painfully wrenched from the ground and suspended in air from the face by a single outstretched right arm. The deep guttural chuckle escaped Tobi's orange mask before he pulled his head back and the chuckle became full-throttle laughter, shaking his upper body immensely. After a few seconds, Tobi stopped laughing and moved his right forefinger to glare menacingly into the now-exposed and terrified eye of Keji. **With this amount of endurance, you would make for a fine shinobi. So, out of 'respect'**, Tobi said that word with a sneer, **Tobi will give you a good death. **And without hesitation in either his voice or his movement, Tobi's Sharingan eye morphed into the Mangekyou and Keji's world turned red and black.

**Deidara's POV**

Her mouth was so agape birds could've laid eggs and made a nest inside and she would never had batted an eye. In fact, anyone could've come over and plucked an eye from her socket, and she'd keep staring straight ahead. Only a hard hit to her head would've been enough to break the stone statue shock apparent on Deidara's face. Luckily for her, there was more than enough of that amongst the debris of the restaurant and the ceiling fan didn't feel like hanging around anymore. BOP! "What the hell?!?" shouted Deidara jumping from her position in the chair looking madly for whoever hit her. Seeing a large figure in the dark restaurant, she quickly threw a couple of clay bats at the unsuspecting person. Jouhi had no time to respond before he was blown into the kitchen with the rest of the restaurant collapsing on top of him. "Hmm. Serves him right, ya. Throwing rocks at a lady and paying costumer." Deidara stopped outside the ruins of the restaurant to witness the devastation her partner had caused on his deadly path of destruction. _But, DAMN. I had no idea Tobi could go AWOL like that. It's really S-Rank worthy. Leader really never makes mistakes. _

**Akatsuki Hideout**

Stifling a small sneeze that threatened to break his normally shadowy genjutsu, Leader only shook his head, knowing that everything was still going according to plan.

**Deidara's POV**

"But, I'd better go save his ass before he gets us in too much trouble, ya. Even if we're feared, we're supposed to conceal our activities a bit more than this." Deidara stopped at a kid who seemed to be paralyzed with fear though the street was quickly deserting. _And I guess tormenting kids runs in the blood. I'll make sure to fix that. _(AN: Fix the Uchiha bloodline or Tobi, which one, I wonder…) A flash of anger went across Deidara's face before she masked it, and jumped to the rooftops, intent on waking Tobi from his madness. However, she barely got a few blocks before her head began ringing like a siren and Deidara fell in pain. _What…the…hell? _She barely registered the sound of a slither overwhelming her senses before three swirling commas appeared in her mind's eye and Deidara fell into darkness…only to reawaken moments later staring into a red sky with an even redder moon hanging ominously within it. _Where-_? Her thought was suddenly cut off by a bloodcurdling scream.

**Tobi-controlled Tsukiyomi**

Without another pause, Tobi took Keji's right hand and channeling electricity into his own hand, crushed Keij's, the electricity staunching the wound and turning any blood or filth into dust. Keji's following violent scream of agony was overpowered by the commanding voice of Tobi's domain. **Maybe Tobi was wrong in my judgment. Shinobi are told to mask their emotions at all times after all. **Tobi paced in front of Keji as he clutched his now useless limb to his body and began to give into unconsciousness as the pain was too great…** Giggle, pay attention now!** Keji gave another stilled cry of pain as his nose was violently bent to the side and he was pushed to the ground. Keji whimpered to himself when he came to the small conclusion that he would in no way be spared mental anguish. **There we go. Can't have you missing out on the fun though we've got all the time in the world! Then again, what happened to that spunk from earlier? Couldn't get enough of my sempai, could you?!? **A series of powerful kicks to Keji's side threw him into the side of a boulder, eliciting a sharp crack from his broken ribs. **You womanizing, **Kick **monstrous**, kick** piece of crap** kick **BARBARIAN! **Tobi dealt a powerful blow to Keji, sliding him across the floor where he stopped unmoving. **NEVER lay a hand on my sempai! **Locking on to his target Tobi began to flash through hand signs. **Never touch my love! AMATERA-!** Tobi lost all sense when a jolting knee came crashing into the side of his face, shattering his mask in the process and throwing his mind into a tumble. Keji's body vanished from the scene as Tobi struggled to recover from the powerful hit. **Wh**ere di**d tha**t **come **fr-?! "Tobi you fucking idiot! What the hell were you about to do?!?" Tobi could only stand in awe at the sudden sight of his Deidara-sempai standing above him in the world of Tsukiyomi. **I-I**- it was all for you…, said Tobi as he suddenly lurched forward. Deidara rushed to catch him before he hit the floor and stared at his battle-weary face. "What are you talking about, you fool?"

Tobi put a hand to his sempai's face. "Tobi didn't want to see you get hurt. I care too much to let someone else ever take advantage of you." Tobi coughed briefly before their surroundings began to shimmer and fade like a projector reaching the end of a movie. "I don't have long." Tobi said before summoning the rest of his strength and pulling his face close to Deidara's and kissing her. She blushed at the suddenness but gave into the immense passion she felt well up from within her as well as from her surroundings. Before the two lovers could fully reach the pinical of their passion the world of Tsukiyomi slowly vanished in a flash of light, and sound. As Deidara's mind separated from Tobi's, she could have sworn she heard a soft male voice utter '大好き'…

**Deidara's POV**

Deidara awoke from her sweet dream atop a random rooftop in the village. _What…? Where am I…?_ She slowly rose to her feet before realizing she was still in the village. "Oh no! Tobi!" Shaking her head to wake herself, she rushed to the crater outside the village that marked Tobi's current location. Seeing his trademark orange mask, she landed next to his prone body and checked his pulse to see if he still lived. After affirming that he was, she picked him up, and spared a glance at the still corpse of Keji. _Dumbass. Least my humiliation has been avenged…even if a bit more strongly than I intended._ Turning her head back towards the village, she shunshin'ed away heading to the nearest hospital.

**Ten minutes later**

A silver-haired man landed in the crater, walking up to the corpse of Keji. Checking it out, the man gasped in amazement. _Wow! Still alive, too! Can't pass up this offer; Orochimaru-sama will be very pleased with a live missing link to experiment on!_ Gathering up the body of Keji, Kabuto shunshin'ed away, leaving no trace of his appearance behind.

HOPE YOU ALL ENJOYED! SORRY THIS WAS A BIT DARK, BUT IT'S BACK TO THE STUFF YOU ENJOYED NEXT CHAP! (and if your confused don't be, everything will be explained) READ AND REVIEW!


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